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Sasquatch Loves Crested Iris -- Now Blooming in Lost Valley
Sasquatch is Believed the Earliest Known Naturalist |
The latest of a rash of Sasquatch sightings occurred in Lost Valley today. Visitors from the Dallas area reported seeing a hairy beast skulking along the trail near the natural bridge. Eyewitnesses said beast seemed to pause near a patch of blue wildflowers and stare intently at butterflies for a few minutes before disappearing in the woods.
"Nobody was more surprised than we were. We were just minding our own business when we looked up and saw the hairy beast. He smelled terrible. We will be coming back a couple of times this year to get a better look, and this time we are bringing a posse."
Sasquatch knows a good thing. Buffalo National River is a largely unknown national treasure in the National Park Service system. The park is the best kept secret in the US. Sasquatch has voted with his residence, evidence of his keen primate intellect. The Buffalo National river has great hiking trails and pristine wilderness areas.
Noted photographer, author, and President of the
Buffalo River Chamber of Commerce offered his thoughts on recent sasquatch sightings. "We welcome the attention sasquatch seekers have brought to the area. The national publicity from sasquatch has reshaped the chamber's strategic plan. Now that we have sasquatch in the Ponca Wilderness area, we have set our sights on promoting the Loch Ness Monster, often seen in the lower reaches of the Buffalo National River close to the confluence with the White River -- we call her "Buffie". The kickoff is our new bumper sticker, "Buffalo Crypto, We Got Your Beast Adventures".
He reflected the view of many pro photographers visiting the area. "An action shot Beast of the Buffalo would be a real wall-hanger. When I get that shot it will be 30"x40" in my living room."
In this 40th anniversary of the establishment of the Buffalo National River, crypto biology fans have become a new and expanding market. A retired park service official who wished to remain anonymous said "Buffie and sasquatch are well known to park staffers. He said there is even a rumored sighting of Buffie and sasquatch squaring off in the river in the Lower Wilderness area, reminiscent of the famous battles between Godzilla and Rodan. I lost $5 on that fight -- oops!. Am I on record?" This has inspired yet another bumper sticker "Buffie and the Beast, The Wilderness SmackDown".
What is next for Buffalo National River? Will it be the same old paradise or will yet another beast make its presence known? Nobody knows for sure, but the best place to get your maps and park information, and keep up to date is
http://buffaloriverchamber.com. Adventure awaits you.
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| Elk Herd Locations, Sasquatch and Wildflowers |
